April 18, 2011

The anti-feminist?

As I've said before, I don't care what choices other people make or how they choose to live their lives. That being said, what I'm about to talk about has nothing to do with the choices other women have made but just how I would feel in a similar situation. Please do me a favor and don't leave me hateful messages about how it works for you or that you enjoy the choices you've made. I hope that's true! I wish that every single person could be completely happy in the life they've chosen. This world would have a lot more going for it if that was the case.

On to my actual topic. I have a friend who introduced me to a blog written by a women who is very similar to me in several ways but in others is a polar opposite. We both love our families, we both love having clean, organized homes, we're close to the same age and we share similar religious beliefs. That's about where the similarities end. This woman believes that she must do ALL of the housework, ALL of the child care, ALL of the cooking and be the best wife, the best cook, the best crafter... everything. I read a post this morning where she was talking about her fabulous "Saturday Evening Fun!" Know what that was? Doing laundry. Lots and lots of laundry. (I'm as crazy as the next person and like to go on a marathon of laundry doing on Monday mornings and just have it over with for the week.) That's all fine and dandy, but why wasn't she out with her husband? Why wasn't he helping? And why why why was it such a big deal that her "hubby-hubs" was soooo amazing to leave his whites in one pile for her?

Again, I'm glad that this sort of life seems to work for her. Putting myself in a similar situation, well, I'm sad just thinking about it. I love that Craig and I will go out and do something (even something as simple as walking around Riverwoods) together every week. Sophie absolutely loves her daddy. To this point, he is the only one who has gotten her to have a real, full on, baby belly laugh. She loves sitting with him in bed while he's on his laptop and either watching the colors change on the screen or trying to push the buttons. It would be really sad if he wasn't involved and didn't have this sort of relationship with her. I don't do all of the dishes, all of the cleaning or all of the baby work and while we're both trying to be better at things, there is not ridiculous strain or demand to be perfect all of the time. Oh, and Craig puts his clothes in the correct laundry basket all the time. ;)

The last thing that made me sad was the fact that not only is this woman attempting to be the perfect everything but her loyal blog-followers also left comments lamenting the fact that they aren't perfect and went on to list their flaws in the house-keeping, wife-being, child-raising department. Can we all take a minute and compliment ourselves on the things we do well? Why is it such a bad thing to recognize the things that we're good at? This doesn't mean that we're better than everyone else or that we don't have room to improve but it's about time we start recognizing the things we're good at. Shall I start?

I am good at planning events.
I am good at teaching primary with Craig.
I am good at making sure we have a healthy diet.
I am getting better at time management.

Okay. Now it's your turn. What are you good at? Stop the "I don't want to brag" line. It's not bragging or being prideful to recognize that you're doing well or are good at something.

5 comments:

  1. Brent and I pride ourselves at being mediocre at just about everything. We both take satisfaction in being "well-rounded" as we like to call it. Neither of us are outstanding in any one area instead we seem to be merely okay at everything. Cleaning house-ok. Laundry-ok. Sports-ok. Meal planning-ok. It's alright to just be ok!

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  2. Hey, there are days when "just okay" would be an improvement! However, I am and always have been good at finding things for other people to do. I'm not so good at actually getting them to do those things, though... Still working on that. "Could you please clean your room? Like before the end of the year? This year?"

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  3. Sarah, I am almost 60 years old. I have been good at a lot of things at different times in my life but these are four things I am good at now, I think:

    1. I am good at keeping my house clean enough to be healthy and dirty enough to be happy.

    2. I am good at eating an elephant one piece at a time.

    3. I am good at claiming the privilege of living my life according to the dictates of my own conscience and allowing all men, and women, the same privilege.

    4. I am good at being a friend.

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  4. Is it possible that the blogger you are referencing was being just a wee bit sarcastic? Sounds like her post may have been tongue-in-cheek...

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  5. um.... no. This is a constant theme through all of her posts.

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