A well-learned lesson?

I got a phone call Tuesday morning in response to an email/resume I had sent out to various dental offices in the area. In my email I clearly stated that I was currently in school but I was interested in helping out/ shadowing an assistant in order to get more experience.  I got a call the very next morning asking for an interview. Naturally, I was quite excited. I called back and set up an appointment with the dentist for the following morning (yesterday).  I got all dressed up (clean pants and my new shirt from my amazing husband) and made my way over to the office. After getting thoroughly lost- the grid system failed me- I found the office and met with the dentist.

It would have been useful if he had actually read my email and resume before calling me for an interview or perhaps even before I got there. Nope. He seemed quite surprised when I seemed surprised that he was interviewing me for a full-time job. One for which I am certainly not ready. Long story short, I went in to assist today from about 9-5:15. I now understand why there are openings at the office. The assistant is super sweet, very kind and patient. While the dentist was demanding and basically expected everyone to be mind readers, the rest of the staff was the exact opposite.

During the course of the day, I learned how to go through all of the steps involved with room prepping (I did it about 10 times by myself today), fill a cavity and cure it, prep and mount a rubber dam, not pass instruments, develop X-Ray film and fully sanitize dental instruments... among other things. I am a firm believer that one day of practical experience is worth 3 days in lecture. Oh, and it's a good idea to make sure that you like (or can at least handle) the people you might someday work with ;)

It's something

I am happy to report that I slept in this morning. Only until about 8:30, but I slept! I got out of bed and showered, blow-dried and styled my hair a bit and I even attempted some makeup (powder and mascara but it's something). I'm now on campus with the intention of studying before a review but I am tired again. 2 chapters of micro in an hour. My new goal.

Time for a step back

Have you ever allowed yourself to become too busy, too wrapped up in your own issues or simply too whelmed by the everyday + tasks that you find yourself becoming a complete blob? Not just any blob but one that has a hard time finding a reason to get out of bed in the morning, can go from being somewhat OCD about cleanliness to being the messy roommate. I seem to have hit that point recently.

At this point I could go on about all of the things that have been eating away at me or the demands that have been placed upon my shoulders, the added responsibilities that seem to grow larger and harder to carry each day,  being shocked by someone you have looked up to for years or worse, finding out that life really isn't easy and it most certainly isn't fair but then I would just be sitting at my keyboard crying. And that doesn't help anyone.

I'll try to be brief. I dropped Craig off at work this morning and drove back to campus to wait for the next item on my agenda. Sometimes I feel more like it is controlling me than I it.  I had been sitting in the warm car listening to quiet music while being illegally parked in the JKB parking lot eating too many thin mints that likely won't stay down when I realized how wrong I have been handling things. Anyone can sit in a warm car eating slightly melty thin mints but not everyone can put them down and get out of the car. As pathetic as it may sound, that seemed like a completely unreachable goal today. I have already ruined the day, right? I was grumpy at the love of my life this morning, kicked the cat who was just trying to get some lovin',  made our oatmeal with about a 1/2 cup too much water, missed most of my last 8:00 class, only half-heartedly did my literature assignment and had eaten almost an entire container of thin mints. But I put the few remaining cookies down, turned off the quiet background noise of the radio and got out of the car. I made it almost to the flag pole in front of the ASB when I heard a pretty little bird sitting in a tree chirping away. My first thought was "See!! Birds really do sound repetitive! It's not just my sound effect!" Once I got past that, I stopped and looked around. There are some pretty patterns in the stonework. The grass is starting to turn green and gosh darn it, I liked that looping bird.

I hate cliches. Perhaps it's true, though. When you are so focused on getting everything around you perfect, you really can't see what is already there. Tender mercy. That's what my little moment was.